Marketing training manual

The buzzword in today's business world is MARKETING. However, people often ask for a simple explanation of what Marketing actually is! Well, here it is: You're a woman and you see a handsome guy at a party.

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The buzzword in today's business world is MARKETING. However, people often
ask for a simple explanation of what "Marketing" actually is! Well, here it
is:
 
You're a woman and you see a handsome guy at a party. You go up to him and
say, "I'm fantastic in bed" -
 
That's Direct Marketing.
 
You're at a party with a bunch of friends and see a handsome guy. One of your
friends goes up to him and pointing at you says, "She's fantastic in bed" -
 
That's Advertising.
 
You see a handsome guy at a party. You go up to him and get his telephone
number. The next day you call and say, "Hi, I'm fantastic in bed" -
 
That's Telemarketing.
 
You see a guy at a party, you straighten your dress. You walk up to him and
pour him a drink. You say, "May I", and reach up to straighten his tie,
brushing your breast lightly against his arm and then say, "By the way, I'm
fantastic in bed" -
 
That's Public Relations.
 
You're at a party and see a handsome guy. He walks up to you and says, I hear
you're fantastic in bed" -
 
That's Brand Recognition.
 
You're at a party and see a handsome guy. He fancies you, but you talk him
into going home with your friend -
 
That's a Sales Rep.
 
Your friend can't satisfy him so he calls you -
 
That's Tech Support.
 
You're on your way to a party when you realise that there could be handsome
men in all these houses you're passing. So you stand in the centre of the
street and shout at the top of your lungs, "I'm fantastic in bed" -
 
That's Junk Mail.
 
You are at a party, a well-built man walks up to you and gropes your breast
and grabs your ass ...
 
That's Arnold Schwarzenegger!
 
YOU LIKE IT, BUT 20 YEARS LATER YOUR ATTORNEY DECIDES YOU WERE OFFENDED.
 
THAT'S AMERICA

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